isToday when i got out of work i couldn't stop back-chatting about money.
Because the bank that i am affiliated to has as for right now propaganda going, that all who let their salaries been put on this bank, will get a chance of winning € 10.000, 00
Now here is the back-chat about this:
I am talking within myself as i am on my bicycle and saying: ''Eh, imagine if you would win this money Larry, what would you do with it....??''
And then i continue with the imagination, and i am saying to myself, the first thing, i would pay all my course of Desteni-i-process and then buy the book that is about to come out about equal money system, and donate the money to Desteni so they may use it, and maybe give some people who can't afford to pay for the book, also a chance to have it anyways.
And as i was thinking this within me i felt good about myself, because i know for sure that i will do this if i had such money in this world. That would be a great investment for sure, the best ever.
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imaging me winning the amount of money that my bank is using as propaganda to get more people using their bank.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagine me, giving money to Desteni in order to help others to also get the book equal money.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a feeling that is good, in connection with the thought of me imagining giving money to Desteni to help others to get the book equal money system.
Thanks...
Larry Manuela
Wednesday 30 March 2011
Sunday 27 March 2011
another back-chatting.
Today my back-chatting was about me and my ex.......the mother of my children.
The reason i started to back-chat about thoughts aloud, is because of the conversation we had about our children and she was telling me that my daughter is telling her that i don't give her much attention when i am with them. And i told her that it is true that i don't give her that much attention, because when i am there she never stay for a long time in the room, she always go up stairs to be with the aunt. only the little boy stays with me always and he is always all around me, it is not me being all around him, but him being all around me, but because of this then there is jealousy between him and her.............the girl get jealous and believe that i am giving only the boy attention and not her, so she went away. But this all she only tell it to the mother, not to me when i am there. Next time i am there i am going to talk to her again and ask her to always tell me anything that she want, because there is nothing i can't take and i will not become angry, i will explain things to her that she doesn't understand in the first place and things like that.
Now here is the back-chatting in relation to this situation/occurrence.
I am trying t bring up my children in a way that they can distinguish between what is real and what not real and this being what is physically being here, and what is not physically being here, right now in the moment of breath.
How the fuck can i tell my children that i love them when i am not doing enough to make the world the best place for them to live in, to participate in without harming and abusing themselves and others as them...???
I don't want my children to become like me and everyone else, fuckers with mental disorders, who don't give a fuck about anyone else but themselves. All they do is worrying about their little pathetic lives. i don't want them to grow up becoming like that.
I don't want them to grow up and become ''good people''......i want them to live equal and one with all life and consider all life equally and as one.
I will say it to them as it is, either they find it hard or not, the truth of what the fuck is really going on in this world and now is the time, and i am not going to wait for when they are older, because when they are older they will be very much brainwashed as all the adults in this world,and then understanding simple facts like poverty and starvation and a money system of abuse and laws and regulations made to abuse will be very hard for them to swallow, they will be against this, because this will be their only meaning for existing and believing that this is all that life is all about, when it is not, when that shit was not even living, it was pure abuse, and nothing but survival of the fittest.
Can you imagine that shit, someone sitting on their bed and having some memory of what happened to them and because of that they start to cry and feel sad and getting all emotional....??? Now this is insanity, but yet it is being seen as ''normal'' because everyone is doing it, or the majority for that matter.
This is a world where children are being abused by their own parents and most of the time the parents don't even know that they are abusing their children. Most children, the majority in this world are being raised in fear, they are punishing the children for what they apparently did bad, or wrong, and because it is so difficult for the brainwashing parents to come up with a solution on how to approach the child and get him/her to understand what the fuck he/she is doing, they will use fear as a tool, a tool to make them or better said, force them to listen to what they BELIEVE is good, positive, right..............what a mess...!!!! But yet the whole world is a living proof that all those believe are just bringing more abusers in existence and more careless fuckers. So that the children of today will be the grown ups of tomorrow, who don't give a fuck about anyone but themselves or their little family and friends, and as far as friendship goes, even that is a little far fetched.
So all parents in this world those who went before us and those who are here right now, listen........: we all have failed in raising our children, all of us. You may disagree with me on this, but it won't matter, because the consequences of that, will be experienced by each individually. we are all responsible for what we accept and allow in this world to exist.
So i will be clear with my children either they are going to like it or not, understand it immediately or not, but telling it as it is, as ugly as it is and dirty as it is i will be doing just exactly that. Because that is what is really going on in this world and how things really are.
There is no fucking love in this world when war, starvation, sufferings of many kind, lies, deceit, and you name it......all those things that will be considered wrong, bad and negative.....exists. and guess what.....??? Who are the one's doing all that...?? Who are the one's participating in wars and letting war continue...??.........who are the one's letting starvation continue....??? who is lying...?? who is deceiving...??.....is it not the human beings.......either you participate in the actual act of all these directly or passively it is still you not taking your responsibility and stop the bullshit.......all of us....!!!
Being a nice/good guy or a nice/good woman, never ever brought any change,real change, to what is here,...........when it(bad,wrong, negative things) are not anymore being experienced, then there is real change. So when there is no more poverty, no more starvation, no more war, no more deceit, no more lies, no more suffering of any kind, no more competition, no more separation all of that in this world then we have made real change, the rest is just bullshit. People talking and believing that they are changing or making some change, but the actuality of change is never to be seen in this world and all who have eyes to see can see, those who can't are blind by their believes and prejudices.
So what the fuck am i to teach my children.....??? Something completely new or continue with the old way that doesn't work at all...??
Thanks
Larry Manuela.
The reason i started to back-chat about thoughts aloud, is because of the conversation we had about our children and she was telling me that my daughter is telling her that i don't give her much attention when i am with them. And i told her that it is true that i don't give her that much attention, because when i am there she never stay for a long time in the room, she always go up stairs to be with the aunt. only the little boy stays with me always and he is always all around me, it is not me being all around him, but him being all around me, but because of this then there is jealousy between him and her.............the girl get jealous and believe that i am giving only the boy attention and not her, so she went away. But this all she only tell it to the mother, not to me when i am there. Next time i am there i am going to talk to her again and ask her to always tell me anything that she want, because there is nothing i can't take and i will not become angry, i will explain things to her that she doesn't understand in the first place and things like that.
Now here is the back-chatting in relation to this situation/occurrence.
I am trying t bring up my children in a way that they can distinguish between what is real and what not real and this being what is physically being here, and what is not physically being here, right now in the moment of breath.
How the fuck can i tell my children that i love them when i am not doing enough to make the world the best place for them to live in, to participate in without harming and abusing themselves and others as them...???
I don't want my children to become like me and everyone else, fuckers with mental disorders, who don't give a fuck about anyone else but themselves. All they do is worrying about their little pathetic lives. i don't want them to grow up becoming like that.
I don't want them to grow up and become ''good people''......i want them to live equal and one with all life and consider all life equally and as one.
I will say it to them as it is, either they find it hard or not, the truth of what the fuck is really going on in this world and now is the time, and i am not going to wait for when they are older, because when they are older they will be very much brainwashed as all the adults in this world,and then understanding simple facts like poverty and starvation and a money system of abuse and laws and regulations made to abuse will be very hard for them to swallow, they will be against this, because this will be their only meaning for existing and believing that this is all that life is all about, when it is not, when that shit was not even living, it was pure abuse, and nothing but survival of the fittest.
Can you imagine that shit, someone sitting on their bed and having some memory of what happened to them and because of that they start to cry and feel sad and getting all emotional....??? Now this is insanity, but yet it is being seen as ''normal'' because everyone is doing it, or the majority for that matter.
This is a world where children are being abused by their own parents and most of the time the parents don't even know that they are abusing their children. Most children, the majority in this world are being raised in fear, they are punishing the children for what they apparently did bad, or wrong, and because it is so difficult for the brainwashing parents to come up with a solution on how to approach the child and get him/her to understand what the fuck he/she is doing, they will use fear as a tool, a tool to make them or better said, force them to listen to what they BELIEVE is good, positive, right..............what a mess...!!!! But yet the whole world is a living proof that all those believe are just bringing more abusers in existence and more careless fuckers. So that the children of today will be the grown ups of tomorrow, who don't give a fuck about anyone but themselves or their little family and friends, and as far as friendship goes, even that is a little far fetched.
So all parents in this world those who went before us and those who are here right now, listen........: we all have failed in raising our children, all of us. You may disagree with me on this, but it won't matter, because the consequences of that, will be experienced by each individually. we are all responsible for what we accept and allow in this world to exist.
So i will be clear with my children either they are going to like it or not, understand it immediately or not, but telling it as it is, as ugly as it is and dirty as it is i will be doing just exactly that. Because that is what is really going on in this world and how things really are.
There is no fucking love in this world when war, starvation, sufferings of many kind, lies, deceit, and you name it......all those things that will be considered wrong, bad and negative.....exists. and guess what.....??? Who are the one's doing all that...?? Who are the one's participating in wars and letting war continue...??.........who are the one's letting starvation continue....??? who is lying...?? who is deceiving...??.....is it not the human beings.......either you participate in the actual act of all these directly or passively it is still you not taking your responsibility and stop the bullshit.......all of us....!!!
Being a nice/good guy or a nice/good woman, never ever brought any change,real change, to what is here,...........when it(bad,wrong, negative things) are not anymore being experienced, then there is real change. So when there is no more poverty, no more starvation, no more war, no more deceit, no more lies, no more suffering of any kind, no more competition, no more separation all of that in this world then we have made real change, the rest is just bullshit. People talking and believing that they are changing or making some change, but the actuality of change is never to be seen in this world and all who have eyes to see can see, those who can't are blind by their believes and prejudices.
So what the fuck am i to teach my children.....??? Something completely new or continue with the old way that doesn't work at all...??
Thanks
Larry Manuela.
back chatting 2
Thursday, 24 March 2011
back-chat diaries 2
Today before i went to work i had a aloud back-chat where i was imagining myself talking in front of an audience and the talk was about the money system and how we accept and allow it to be as it is and abuse ourselves and others in participating in all the mess.
I was saying: ''how can it be dear people that we have come so far as to in-slave ourselves to a system where we have come to only survive and made laws, rules and regulations within these parameters to serve only a select few, so they can have the best and the rest, which is the majority can continue fueling their system of abuse.''
we can only change this when we stop and create anew, but create anew means really create anew.......nothing of the old should exist anymore.
I was talking to a colleague of mine today at work and i asked him if he is not tired of how things are in this world and also, that i am fucking bored, because everything is the same always.
I asked him are we really just here to learn something at school just in order to survive better later when we are grownups and after done labor for a long time, we go with pension and finally we just DIE. And people are so blind and stupid that they even say something stupid like: ''that is why one should enjoy one's life, because, you never know when your day is going to come..?''
Only stupid, careless and uninformed and ignorant people say these kind of things, people who do not know WTF is going on in this world and even when they do know they don't give a damn about it. They will do anything to make their little life as enjoyable as possible, but on the expense of billions that suffer everyday.
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagining myself talking in front of an audience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to say: '' how can it be dear people, that we have come so far as to in-slave ourselves to a system where we have come to only survive and made laws, rules and regulations within these parameters to only serve a select few, so they can have the best and the rest which is the majority can continue fueling their system of abuse.''
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel boredom towards what i see in this world as being the same things over and over, again and again.
O.k. Thanks.
Larry Manuela.
I was saying: ''how can it be dear people that we have come so far as to in-slave ourselves to a system where we have come to only survive and made laws, rules and regulations within these parameters to serve only a select few, so they can have the best and the rest, which is the majority can continue fueling their system of abuse.''
we can only change this when we stop and create anew, but create anew means really create anew.......nothing of the old should exist anymore.
I was talking to a colleague of mine today at work and i asked him if he is not tired of how things are in this world and also, that i am fucking bored, because everything is the same always.
I asked him are we really just here to learn something at school just in order to survive better later when we are grownups and after done labor for a long time, we go with pension and finally we just DIE. And people are so blind and stupid that they even say something stupid like: ''that is why one should enjoy one's life, because, you never know when your day is going to come..?''
Only stupid, careless and uninformed and ignorant people say these kind of things, people who do not know WTF is going on in this world and even when they do know they don't give a damn about it. They will do anything to make their little life as enjoyable as possible, but on the expense of billions that suffer everyday.
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagining myself talking in front of an audience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to say: '' how can it be dear people, that we have come so far as to in-slave ourselves to a system where we have come to only survive and made laws, rules and regulations within these parameters to only serve a select few, so they can have the best and the rest which is the majority can continue fueling their system of abuse.''
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel boredom towards what i see in this world as being the same things over and over, again and again.
O.k. Thanks.
Larry Manuela.
back-chat tracings
Thursday, 17 March 2011
back-chat tracings
Today i almost was late at my work. I got up early and all, but instead of stepping out of bed and go and take a shower i continue taking a little more nap.
Suddenly i just jump up and look at the time on my phone and noticed that i had only 30 minutes left to reach work.
Now as i was on my way at work on my bike i started talking to myself as if i am talking to someone else and i was saying to myself: '' just keep on cycling you will get on time, don't worry.''
And the voice continue: '' don't pull your phone and look at the time because otherwise you're going to affect your time to reach work on time''
and when i got at work and stood before the punching machine i saw it read: 06:02, this meant that i was 2 minutes late, and the voice in my mind said: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.''
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe and perceive time to be of influence in my existence in my reality.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be in fear of not reaching work on time.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to talking to myself as if there is another self inside me in separation of me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought: '' just keep on cycling you will get on time, don't worry'' to exist within me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought: '' just keep on cycling and you will get on time, don't worry'' to an emotion of fear in order to not be on time at work.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing fear to exist within me as me as an emotional experience within me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the thought: '' don't pull your phone and look at the time because otherwise you're going to affect your time to reach work on time'' to be part of me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to let the the thought: ''don't pull your phone and look at the time because otherwise you're going to affect your time to reach work on time'' to instill fear in me for maybe not getting at work on time.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the thought: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.'' to exist within me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.'' to a feeling of relief because i was not that late after all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to even letting the thought: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.'' to bring forth a feeling within me as me.
o.k. that's it.
Thanks
Larry Manuela
Suddenly i just jump up and look at the time on my phone and noticed that i had only 30 minutes left to reach work.
Now as i was on my way at work on my bike i started talking to myself as if i am talking to someone else and i was saying to myself: '' just keep on cycling you will get on time, don't worry.''
And the voice continue: '' don't pull your phone and look at the time because otherwise you're going to affect your time to reach work on time''
and when i got at work and stood before the punching machine i saw it read: 06:02, this meant that i was 2 minutes late, and the voice in my mind said: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.''
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe and perceive time to be of influence in my existence in my reality.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be in fear of not reaching work on time.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to talking to myself as if there is another self inside me in separation of me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought: '' just keep on cycling you will get on time, don't worry'' to exist within me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought: '' just keep on cycling and you will get on time, don't worry'' to an emotion of fear in order to not be on time at work.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing fear to exist within me as me as an emotional experience within me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the thought: '' don't pull your phone and look at the time because otherwise you're going to affect your time to reach work on time'' to be part of me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to let the the thought: ''don't pull your phone and look at the time because otherwise you're going to affect your time to reach work on time'' to instill fear in me for maybe not getting at work on time.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the thought: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.'' to exist within me as me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the thought: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.'' to a feeling of relief because i was not that late after all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to even letting the thought: '' not bad, at least you are not 15 minutes or more late, this is acceptable, now lets change your clothing and get started before they start missing you.'' to bring forth a feeling within me as me.
o.k. that's it.
Thanks
Larry Manuela
back-chat diaries
Sunday, 20 March 2011
back-chat diaries
Today my back-chat was about me being angry, and was imagining myself being on a radio talk program and reacting and responding in this imagination, to a pastor who was reacting to what i was saying about oneness and equality. And all this is in relation to the video Bernard made: ''the proof that faith failed everywhere.''
What i was saying to this pastor is the following:
O.k. pastor let me bring this down to you easy:
There are enough Christians in this world to proof to all here that Christianity didn't, doesn't and won't work.
There are enough Muslims in this world to proof to all that Islam didn't, doesn't, and won't work.
There are enough Hindu's in this world to proof to all that Hinduism didn't,doesn't and won't work.
There are enough Buddhists in this world to proof to all that Buddhism didn't, doesn't and won't work.
there are enough:
Babism
Bahá'i
Gnosticism
Judiasm
Rastafari movement
Mandaeans and Sabianism
Samaritanism
Unitarian Universalism
Ayyavazhism
Bhaktism
Din-i-llahism
Jainism
Sikhism
Confucianism
Shitoism
Taoism
African Diasporic Religions\
Polytheism
New Age
Esotericism
Neogaanism
Mysticism
Occult
Magical
Left hand Path
Creativity Movement
Shinshukyo Movement
Fictional Religions
Parody and Mock Religions
Politics
Atheism
And so on and on and on..................
All the groups that have sub-divisions within and of the main one group.
So all in all, all of them are proof to all that none didn't, doesn't and won't work.
And who are the once believing/having faith in all this stuff....???
Is it not the human being...??
I don't see any animal, plant, or any physically manifested life expression believing/have faith and creating all this stuff.
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to even have a back-chat where i experience a emotion that is of anger towards a imagination that is not even real.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect this imagination to the video that Bernard did, called: ''the proof the faith failed everywhere.''
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to categorize some of all those faith movements on this planet to proof a point.
thanks.
Bye bye
Larry Manuela
What i was saying to this pastor is the following:
O.k. pastor let me bring this down to you easy:
There are enough Christians in this world to proof to all here that Christianity didn't, doesn't and won't work.
There are enough Muslims in this world to proof to all that Islam didn't, doesn't, and won't work.
There are enough Hindu's in this world to proof to all that Hinduism didn't,doesn't and won't work.
There are enough Buddhists in this world to proof to all that Buddhism didn't, doesn't and won't work.
there are enough:
Babism
Bahá'i
Gnosticism
Judiasm
Rastafari movement
Mandaeans and Sabianism
Samaritanism
Unitarian Universalism
Ayyavazhism
Bhaktism
Din-i-llahism
Jainism
Sikhism
Confucianism
Shitoism
Taoism
African Diasporic Religions\
Polytheism
New Age
Esotericism
Neogaanism
Mysticism
Occult
Magical
Left hand Path
Creativity Movement
Shinshukyo Movement
Fictional Religions
Parody and Mock Religions
Politics
Atheism
And so on and on and on..................
All the groups that have sub-divisions within and of the main one group.
So all in all, all of them are proof to all that none didn't, doesn't and won't work.
And who are the once believing/having faith in all this stuff....???
Is it not the human being...??
I don't see any animal, plant, or any physically manifested life expression believing/have faith and creating all this stuff.
Self-forgiveness statements:
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to even have a back-chat where i experience a emotion that is of anger towards a imagination that is not even real.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect this imagination to the video that Bernard did, called: ''the proof the faith failed everywhere.''
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to categorize some of all those faith movements on this planet to proof a point.
thanks.
Bye bye
Larry Manuela
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