another back-chatting.

Today my back-chatting was about me and my ex.......the mother of my children.
The reason i started to back-chat about thoughts aloud, is because of the conversation we had about our children and she was telling me that my daughter is telling her that i don't give her much attention when i am with them. And i told her that it is true that i don't give her that much attention, because when i am there she never stay for a long time in the room, she always go up stairs to be with the aunt. only the little boy stays with me always and he is always all around me, it is not me being all around him, but him being all around me, but because of this then there is jealousy between him and her.............the girl get jealous and believe that i am giving only the boy attention and not her, so she went away. But this all she only tell it to the mother, not to me when i am there. Next time i am there i am going to talk to her again and ask her to always tell me anything that she want, because there is nothing i can't take and i will not become angry, i will explain things to her that she doesn't understand in the first place and things like that.

Now here is the back-chatting in relation to this situation/occurrence.

I am trying t bring up my children in a way that they can distinguish between what is real and what not real and this being what is physically being here, and what is not physically being here, right now in the moment  of breath.
How the fuck can i tell my children that i love them when i am not doing enough to make the world the best place for them to live in, to participate in without harming and abusing themselves and others as them...???
I don't want my children to become like me and everyone else, fuckers with mental disorders, who don't give a fuck about anyone else but themselves. All they do is worrying about their little pathetic lives. i don't want them to grow up becoming like that.
I don't want them to grow up and become ''good people''......i want them to live equal and one with all life and consider all life equally and as one.
I will say it to them as it is, either they find it hard or not, the truth of what the fuck is really going on in this world and now is the time, and i am not going to wait for when they are older, because when they are older they will be very much brainwashed as all the adults in this world,and then understanding simple facts like poverty and starvation and a money system of abuse and laws and regulations made to abuse will be very hard for them to swallow, they will be against this, because this will be their only meaning for existing and believing that this is all that life is all about, when it is not, when that shit was not even living, it was pure abuse, and nothing but survival of the fittest.

Can you imagine that shit, someone sitting on their bed and having some memory of what happened to them and because of that they start to cry and feel sad and getting all emotional....???   Now this is insanity, but yet it is being seen as ''normal'' because everyone is doing it, or the majority for that matter.

This is a world where children are being abused by their own parents and most of the time the parents don't even know that they are abusing their children. Most children, the majority in this world are being raised in fear, they are punishing the children for what they apparently did bad, or wrong, and because it is so difficult for the brainwashing parents to come up with a solution on how to approach the child and get him/her to understand what the fuck he/she is doing, they will use fear as a tool, a tool to make them or better said, force them to listen to what they BELIEVE is good, positive, right..............what a mess...!!!! But yet the whole world is a living proof that all those believe are just bringing more abusers in existence and more careless fuckers. So that the children of today will be the grown ups of tomorrow, who don't give a fuck about anyone but themselves or their little family and friends, and as far as friendship goes, even that is a little far fetched.

So all parents in this world those who went before us and those who are here right now, listen........: we all have failed in raising our children, all of us. You may disagree with me on this, but it won't matter, because the consequences of that, will be experienced by each individually. we are all responsible for what we accept and allow in this world to exist.

So i will be clear with my children either they are going to like it or not, understand it immediately or not, but telling it as it is, as ugly as it is and dirty as it is i will be doing just exactly that. Because that is what is really going on in this world and how things really are.

There is no fucking love in this world when war, starvation, sufferings of many kind, lies, deceit, and you name it......all those things that will be considered wrong, bad and negative.....exists. and guess what.....???   Who are the one's doing all that...??  Who are the one's participating in wars and letting war continue...??.........who are the one's letting starvation continue....???    who is lying...??   who is deceiving...??.....is it not the human beings.......either you participate in the actual act of all these directly or passively it is still you not taking your responsibility and stop the bullshit.......all of us....!!!

Being a nice/good guy or a nice/good woman, never ever brought any change,real change, to what is here,...........when it(bad,wrong, negative things) are not anymore being experienced, then there is real change. So when there is no more poverty, no more starvation, no more war, no more deceit, no more lies, no more suffering of any kind, no more competition, no more separation all of that in this world then we have made real change, the rest is just bullshit. People talking and believing that they are changing or making some change, but the actuality of change is never to be seen in this world and all who have eyes to see can see, those who can't are blind by their believes and prejudices.


So what the fuck am i to teach my children.....??? Something completely new or continue with the old way that doesn't work at all...??



Thanks




Larry Manuela.